If you have, or suspect you may have social anxiety, attending events like parties may be very difficult and possibly even panic-inducing. No matter where the fear comes from, being around a large group of people for an extended period of time can be incredibly nerve-wracking.
Sometimes, though, you may have to or just really want to go to a certain event without social anxiety getting in the way. Of course, it would be much better to be able to just enjoy a party with friends, coworkers, or family, but unfortunately, there’s no switch in our brains to simply turn the anxiety off. There are, however, ways you can cope with your anxiety before and during a party to minimize your discomfort.
The Pre-Party Calm
Sometimes the anticipation of an upcoming party can set your anxiety off before you even get there. It can be easy to get yourself so worked up in preparation for an event that you can only focus on your nerves and not the actual party. Try a few methods of keeping yourself calm before the party begins.
Take your time getting ready. Trying to rush will only heighten your nerves, so if you’re able to, take the majority of the day to prepare. Make yourself some soothing herbal tea and take a relaxing bath instead of a shower put yourself in a calm state from the start of everything. Play music and try to have fun while you get ready. Focus on the task at hand or sing along to the music instead of dwelling on the party. You can even put on a TV show or movie to distract yourself further.
If you’re having trouble keeping yourself calm before leaving home, a little extra relaxation help can’t hurt. Marijuana (provided that it’s legal where you live, of course) can be a very effective way of lightening your mood and helping you to relax. It’s been known to improve anxiety and might help you get through the party easier. Try some gummies or a jet fuel strain and see how it affects your nerves. Just be careful not to take too high a dose of any THC product, as high doses can actually worsen anxiety. Stick to low-dose THC or simply take a CBD product instead to eliminate the risk.
Buddy System
When you suffer from anxiety, especially social anxiety, it can be very helpful to have a friend with you for support when you’re going into a stressful situation. If you’re able to, bring a friend you trust who you know will be supportive and help you through the party.
Before the event, speak with the friend you want to bring with you. Talk to them about your needs and concerns. If they aren’t aware of your anxiety, you can simply tell them you’re nervous or discuss the disorder with them if you’re comfortable. Explain why you’d like to have them at this event and what you’d like them to do.
Once your friend knows what your expectations are, the two of you can create a plan for how to navigate the party and minimize your stress. Speak with your friend about how you want introductions to go, and if you’d rather introduce them to people or let them introduce themselves. Be sure to ask what they’re comfortable with as well. They’re going to this party for you, so you don’t want to put them in an awkward situation. Discuss how long you’ll be there and consider coming up with a signal to tell the other person you need to leave right away because of your anxiety or any other reason.
At the actual party, be sure to check in with your friend periodically. They’ll want to know if you’re doing okay and you should make sure they’re alright too. And although your friend is there so they can support you, try to have fun with them as well. You’ll be at a party, after all. With a good friend beside you, it might be easier to let go of your worries and actually enjoy it.
When It’s Too Much
No matter how you prepare beforehand, there’s a chance you may still get overwhelmed and panic. You need to plan ahead of time what to do if this happens and have a strategy to calm yourself down or to leave quickly.
If you feel your anxiety spiking, it’s perfectly acceptable to excuse yourself and go either outside or to the restroom for a bit. You can take a few minutes away from everyone there to try to calm down. Everyone needs to use the bathroom or get some fresh air now and then, so don’t worry about people taking particular notice of you stepping out for a while. With a party going on, it’s likely that most people won’t even notice, or if they do they probably won’t think anything of it.
When you step away, it’s good to run through some breathing exercises to get your blood pressure down and your nerves under control. There are many different breathing exercises you can learn and practice beforehand that are handy in any anxiety-inducing situation. It’s a good skill to know in general, and you should consider researching different techniques whether you have a party to attend or not.
If you’re unable to calm yourself down, it might be best to simply leave. This may feel disheartening or like you’re giving up, but it can be dangerous to push yourself past a certain point. If you can’t get your heart rate regulated, you’re starting to feel pain in your chest, or you feel like you can’t breathe, take that as a sign that it’s time to get out of there. Leave as quickly and quietly as possible so as not to cause a scene and draw attention to yourself. If you’re not able to thank the host of the party before leaving, simply contact them the day after.
Social anxiety can be difficult to deal with in any situation, but especially at a party. Just remember to breathe and try to enjoy the event if you can. Take care of yourself and put your mental health first always.
